Hello Jerk Offs,
Today on the Uncle Sidney Show we will talk about something that is near and dear to me and which that Bastard Santa Claus didn't bring me any, Pornography. Theres nothing better in life than a cheap cigar and a Porn Film. And thats exactly what i want to talk about, Cheap Cigars and Porn. The other day I was over at my son Pud's house and he was watchin' the Empty Vee when this show came on "True Life, I'm addicted to Porn" And there was this loser on there that still lives with his Gramma and doesn't have a job or a girlfriend and sits around watching porn all day. Now I knows what yer sayin' Uncle Sidney...You like Porn, You don't have a job..Yeah but I'm in my seventies, a Vet and I worked since I was 13 until I retired at age 69. But anyways this loser was watching Porn and smoking a cheap cigar, looks at the camera and sez, "I like to smoke cigars while I'm watching Porn, It keeps it elegant" The motherfucking bastard was smoking a Forty Nine Cent Special!!! Nothin' Elegant about THAT!! Every Motherfucking BUM on Skid Row must be elegant then!!!CLICK HERE TO WATCH EPISODE
Anyways This kid was roaming around Placenta (I coulda swore thats what He called it!) buying Porno and getting lap dances and then his stupid Daddy talked him into burning his entire porn collection which turned out from what I could see, just a hand full of cheap DVDs he down loaded from this site here
In another part of the show a big fat loser with a stuck up fat ugly wife who needs a big penis shoved up her butt every night whined about how he was going to loose everything he ever loved if he didn't stop watching porn. My GOD If I had a bitchy wife like her, I'd watch porn all the time too, Hell I have a lovely wife and WE still watch Porn! But the funniest part comes when this Fat loser says "I broke down and watched some porn and masturbated" SO? What's the crime in THAT??? Hell everybody should Buy MORE Porn And Support the Industry!!
Then this loser calls up some low life Anti-Porn Church and whines about how he is going to loose his lovely Fat Sow if he doesn't stop whackin' it to Porn...Hell, If the fat bastard wants religion so much maybe he should drop the cow and just read THE BIBLE
Some people don't know how good they have it.
Well kids , Happy New Year, You Fucking Bitches!
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